Blog on the Lillypad
Thursday, September 04, 2003
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Thursday September 4 is my birthday. |
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A Real Birthday Surprise So guess what I got on MY birthday? If you're a woman, I bet you can guess right away. If you're a man----well, never mind. Let's just say code red is now Go. I am writing this at 8:50 a.m. The people at work are tiptoeing around me to keep the party a surprise. But as we all unfailingly give people a morning birthday party on the day of their birthday, it is merely good form for me to pretend to be surprised and for them to keep everything as secret as possible. This is how it goes when you work with very nice people, and I do work with very nice people. This company makes vaccines to protect children against meningitis. We have pictures of chubby, healthy babies everywhere, and the people (overall) are very gentle and kind. |
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Birthday Poem for Candle lighters You've been banned from having birthdays A new rule has been made Signed ,sealed and delivered By the local Fire Brigade! They say that all those candles Would create such a blaze They'd have to come and put it out And stay around for days ! So, I guess You'll have to party Without the birthday cake, Perhaps You'll light one candle Just for old time's sake , Those firemen ! So fit and strong, Such handsome looking men - Whose birthday is it ,anyway ? Heck, light them all again ! |
Thanks to my sister Patti for TWO gift certificates to Amazon.com!
Send Happy Birthday wishes to jeriwho@pipeline.com
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Dear Miss Massi, I want to write fiction that glorifies God. Great! But keep in mind these limitations: |
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Birthday Poem for Old Farts Author unknown Edited for brevity A fart can be short, A fart can be long, Some farts have been known to sound just like a song... A fart can create a most curious medley, A fart can be harmless, or silent, but deadly... A fart can occur in a number of places, And leave everyone with strange looks on their faces... But not all farts are bad, this is simply not true - We mustn't forget... Old farts like you! |
Thanks to the guys at Whole Foods for the beans, the cheese, the tabasco sauce!
Send birthday wishes to jeriwho@pipeline.com
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Warning of Terrorism by food poisoning The FBI now warns that terrorism manuals seized in the War on Terror include instructions on how to poison by nicotine and solanine. These are two alkaloids that do not have specific antidotes available. Poisoning can occur via ingestion, inhalation, or absorption through the skin. Burning in the mouth, dryness in the throat, nausea, vomiting, are common symptoms. Best treatment: medical care. Symptoms may develop from moderate to severe, so waiting is not a good option. Normal medical treatment for severe poisoning includes support for the cardiac system and the respiratory system, stomach lavage with activated charcoal, and (in the event of posioning through the skin) a thorough washing and rinsing of the contaminated area. |
